DRIPPY'S WIFE

DEAR ABBY: Every faucet in our house has a slow drip -- the kitchen sink, the bathtub, the upstairs bathroom. My husband "Earl's" response to the kitchen drip is that he wants to replace the entire sink and countertop, so "we'll do it all then." For the one in our bathtub, he says, "We're going to tear all that out anyway and put in a new tub." Earl avidly watches home improvement shows and drags me to home improvement stores to look at the replacements, but never buys anything or follows through with any projects.

I am willing to approve anything that gets the drips stopped, whether it's a faucet replacement or a whole new kitchen. Earl is fully capable of doing the job himself and has all the new tools.

I might add that he takes the same approach to the old truck he's going to fix up, the painting that needs to be done, the porch to be replaced and other projects. He is full of talk, but to myself I refer to him as "the Big Drip." How do I get him to fix the problem? -- DRIPPY'S WIFE

I like Earl's approach. Don't fix the small problem, wait until you can make it a bigger mess and handle everything at that point.

This approach should worry you when it comes to your nagging because he's probably thinking, "Why argue now, since I'm going to empty our bank account and run off with a barely legal stripper?"

You say Earl is "fully capable" but I think of him as a "lazy slob." He will never fix the sink, his car or his stereotypical marriage spats because he would rather watch home improvement shows on TV and buy tools he's never going to use. Let me guess... he likes to drink beer too!

Here's my excellent advice. Tell him you're going to fix the drips if he doesn't. You don't really need to know how to fix anything, you just need to know how to make things so much worse he'll have no choice but to fix the gallons of water flowing onto the kitchen floor.

There are only two possible outcomes: Earl will fix the sink. Or you will have an affair with the new plumber. Either way, you win!

Your advice, readers?